Avoidance Might Just be Safest

With spring comes the thaw and reactivation of the zombie horde (as opposed to the zombie hoard, which S.D. keeps in the basement and occasionally feeds a loose neighborhood pet to), and they start going out and about.  Currently, please be aware that zombies can still drive.  Perhaps not drive, per se, but they can make a vehicle go sort of where they want it to go.  To avoid interactions with zombies driving (randomly) all about you, it is important to be vigilant and to keep your vehicle in excellent running condition.  If you hit a pothole whilst swerving to avoid a zombie in a Buick, you really do not want a vital part of your car to go flying off, leaving you stuck or stranded, far away from home, and served up to the shambling hordes.

Another important thing is to know how to accelerate.  Get quickly past those slow zombie bastards!  Be aware, though, this may be a trap that you do not want to drive into, so look ahead and, once again, be vigilant!

Know your territory.  Having a good general sense of direction is best, and knowing back roads is VITAL.  GPS units are no good at helping you avoid undead hot-spots.  Be able to exit from the highway and get to where you need to be easily, avoiding minivans full of big and little zombies going to zombie soccer practice or zombie dance class.

This is a non-traditional world, you will have to take non-traditional means to get where you need to go, when is the only variable.

To sum up:
-keep your vehicle in good repair 
-keep your vehicle full of fuel
-be vigilant
-know your territory
-it's the long one on the right.  use it.
-beware of zombie traps
-don't go into the box in the first place.  always think and be outside the box.

Pumpkins all Year Long

I realize that somehow not all of you are "into" Halloween as S.D. and I are, and might not have the plethora of jack o'lanterns that we do, hence do not have the quantity of pumpkin seeds we end up with, but let me share a great way to use pumpkins all year long!

The day after Halloween, head out to your local farmer.  The local farmer will want to get rid of his pumpkins desperately.  We often buy enough pumpkins to fill the back of my pick-up truck, and make it steer funny for about $20.00.  Now, the farmer will likely have winter squash, maybe honey, perhaps some other stuff, too.  Buy that so you can support that agriculture, too.  Who knows? You may be helping a kid through college!

Anyway, what we like to do with the majority of our pumpkins is to set them out and spend the day shooting them as they advance (the Pumpkin Invasion).  I have no idea, nor do I care if they reseed in the field after this.  The few (10 or so) that we held back go back home with us to get processed.  When we process the pumpkin, we turn it into easy to use, year-round food product.  Sometimes we can simply store the pumpkin, but if there is any puncture or scrape in the side of the pumpkin, it will rot quickly.  This method keeps waste at a minimum.

The pumpkin gets cut in half, the stem area cut out, and scraped out of it's seeds.  Half the pumpkin gets put, cut side down, on a large cake pan (Wilton's half-sheet) and roasted for about and hour or two, closer to two at about 350 to 400*.  The pumpkin will collapse during this time, some or a lot.  When you pull it out of the oven, the skin peels off easily, and the pumpkin can then be put into baggies, cut into roughly 5x5" slices.  We then put those in one of our freezers, stacked up like bricks.  The second half gets roasted, so on and so forth for days.

The seeds get put into baggies and frozen, too, to get roasted later in the year. When we roast them later in the year, they get thawed and roasted (unsalted) at about 350* until done but NOT BURNED.  Burned seeds get junked into winter compost, as they will make everything they are put into taste burned. 

The seeds will get ground in the coffee grinder (long since we've stopped using it for coffee) in batches as needed.  I'll replace  up to half the flour in a recipe with pumpkin seed meal.  It adds quite a lot of protein, a nutty flavor (with out adding nuts, which is really nice when you have company with nut allergies!), potassium, magnesium and fiber! 

The frozen pumpkin gets thawed and drained (a LOT of water will come out!), then it gets pureed and added to recipes as a low calorie recipe stretcher, a moisture additive, and a taste enhancer.  It works wonders!

If your only source of pumpkins is jack o'lanterns, you can use the left over cuttings and scrape your pumpkins really thin (which makes them easier to carve!) to use the pumpkin pulp!  Of course, we have at least 10 jack o'lanterns, so there's quite a lot to keep from them, too!

Our next challenge is to preserve pumpkin products without using the freezer.  When the ZA hits, the freezer might just be a point of moot.

Another Guide to Help Avoid GMOs

http://www.garden-of-eatin.com/how-to-avoid-monsanto/

my big plan is to use up the seeds I have and replace with seeds from safe-seed companies.  I'll be throwing out the (very few) GM seeds I know I have.

The garden will have flowers among the vegetables, as I feel the need for a mix of colors and flowers are good for attracting bees and other pollinators.  So far it looks like I only have to order amaranth, onions and tomatillos, and perhaps any winter squash I want to try my hand at.

We're debating on having an elderberry bush set in the yard.  That decision will have to be made soon.

A Few Things to Look Out For

Some things to avoid during and before the ZA:
-trailer parks.  especially the ones all crowded together-like
-processed foods
-television
-commercials
-cologne ads in fashion magazines (with the scent-strips)
-image devices used by the TSA
-sodium laureth sulfate
-nitrates
-GMO foods
-caramel coloring
-Justin Beiber
-bi-partisan politics
-bottled water
-anything from California
-Top 40 music (see: Justin Beiber)
-poodles
-excess soy products (see GMO foods)

this is just a partial list of things you just want nothing to do with.  Now, if you live in a trailer park, live as clean as you can, and keep your guns loaded.  Turn off the TV and don't let your neighbors in.

Florida Would be Fucked

There is no gentle way of putting it: Florida will not survive the ZA, unless the residents are inland and in rural areas.

We've been traveling about in FL for a bit now, and have noticed a complete lack of sustainability in any form.  Not even a kitchen garden to be seen in any of the metro areas we've been in.  Add into that the sheer quantity of trailer parks (zombie incubators) and slow-moving retirees, and you've got a ZA disaster zone!


If you happen to be in FL, be sure to keep your boat fueled up, have a store of food stocked, and stay away from trailer parks!  There is opportunity everywhere!  Fence up your yard, put in raised beds within the yard, raise your protein, have an escape plan, and for goodness sake, keep the shotguns loaded and ready to go!  You will have to go out of your way to secure your compound, as it does seem that building materials standing in close formation often will pass as a secure residence.  


On the upside, real estate is cheap, so buying a big lot with an empty house is within easy reach.  Just make sure when you relocate, it's far away from the zombies in a can-yard.  Good luck!

So, how long do you want to stay dead?

I should rephrase that to be, how long do you want to stay UNdead?  I am fairly certain that filling oneself with preservative-filed "foods" (BARF) will keep one preserved well past the grave.  Eating whole foods, foods as close as possible to it's original form, sans preservatives will allow you to rot peacefully away post-mortem.

When the ZA springs forth (as observed, probably at the airport), eventually we may all come to an inevitable end as the walking dead.  We have a choice, to stay undead for a long long time, to get shot in the head, or to rot fairly quickly and have the whole thing over with.  Eating a diet of BARF will not only speed the ZA along, but will undoubtedly prolong one's tenure as a shuffling flesh-eater, and I really would not recommend it.

Now for the only warning about eating clean, healthy foods: People who eat clean and healthy foods tend to not be placated easily; they tend to be uppity and speak out against things that are obviously wrong, stupid, or impractical.  If you eat the clean foods, especially spicy foods, you may be more likely to become a rage zombie if infected.  However, infection is unlikely as you will be able to outrun and out think the shufflers that eat BARF.

Have a healthy life and a rotten death. :)

Just Enough Truth

I tell people to not listen or buy things from Kevin Trudeau.  This was an amusing read (and in large font, so it goes quickly) of charges brought against him from the FTC.  I was going to recommend only the first 13 pages, but the whole thing is a hoot.  He mixes just enough truth in with his bs to make it sound credible.

http://www.ftc.gov/os/caselist/0323064/071121order.pdf

Snake oil salesmen have been around since the early 1800's, this guy is just another one of them.  High colonics and dianetics will not make you lose weight.  At least not in a healthy way. Might lighten your wallet some.

Have fun!