Day 11, Aug 20 (Monday)

Day 11, Aug 20 (Monday)

Check out of MacKenzie and picked up the car.  It’s a VW Polo (a little smaller than a Golf).  5 speed manual.  More on driving in the appendix.  Last breakfast, needless to say one of us won’t miss it, one will.  Drove to Biggar (pronounced “bigger”), the closed “market town” to Shieldhill Castle.  We parked in the town centered and decided to walk around as this is less likely to result in auto accidents or moving violations.

it all fit, somehow

Lunch at The Crown, and pub and local favorite.  We went to a heart and stroke thrift store for fun.  Bought a few presents for friends and hope they will survive the monkey handlers on Icelandair.

safety labels crack me up, especially this one

Took a nice stroll after lunch and went to the Biggar Town Parrish, a 450+ year old church.  It’s now an Episcopalian Church.  Neat old graveyard, planted another letterbox there.  Took some pictures, then stopped inside the church and had a nice chat with the elder volunteer doing meet and greet that day.  We took some pictures of the stained glass and the sanctuary.  The elder told us the bridge in town is where William Wallace snuck into town after the loss at Culloden.  We took some pictures, but after chatting with the local crossing guard (who lived in California for 35 years), that is more like allegedly crossed.  Apparently claims to Wallace fame are common in towns and cities.

Stool of Repentance... sounds like something boo does

 

the bridge in question

boo, walking in William Wallace's footsteps

Shieldhill Castle

Originally built in 1199, there have been many, many additions over the past 800 years.  In a word, it’s “amazing” in so many ways.  The Zimbals would have loved it back in the 1970’s with all the classical nouveau riche decorating.  Quite the eclectic collection of antiques, medieval architecture, and the finest decorations from Michaels, Pier One, and CostPlus World Market.

just like in ye olden days!

The bed, with flocked wall paper.  There aren't words.  Pornos have better and more tasteful decorations. Or so I'm told.

Our sink, with non-functioning soap/lotion dispenser and glass.  Note the peeling sparkly bits.

I didn't know it until now, but our house
definitely needs some brass deer mounts.

This stylized tableau is at a landing on the stairs.  Needed the tripod and long exposure to capture the beauty of this exquisitely conceptualized scene.

No words.

The hallway leading to the "bride's room" that is used for weddings.

pond... full of festering shit.

not so bad, from the outside.

Spent some time taking some pictures of the exterior of the property as well.  There was a small pet cemetery that was oddly touching, considering the tacky nature of the wedding center they have and the “log cabins” for extra guests.  The Event’s Manager gave us an impromptu tour and admitted there are a lot of things she wants to get fixed, starting with a front to back, top to bottom inventory and cleanout of the worst of it.

This place is more than a little Faulty Towers in how it’s run.  Clearly every meal, every room, and every day is a small miracle that it survived.  They try hard and bus their asses, but the high class is a thin veneer, much like a pretty girl and guy all dolled up for the state fair midway.

We did the fine dining option for dinner.  The food was excellent, and we plan to copy the cocoa mousse and sticky toffee pudding recipes.  Diane took a nice picture of the spray on dusting compound bottle on the mantle.  Breakfast was also very nice, although from the other guests, it appears that one should only order off the short menu with no changes.  Diane took a nice picture of a paint by numbers stag painting.

Diane’s notes:

Sweet. Mother. Of. Satan.

Nouveau riche should just not decorate.  Ever.  Never have I ever seen such a wretched over the top, tasteless, gilt and flocked, travesty of décor. 

Dinner was very good, it was three courses.  I had smoked salmon and capers, steak, and the sticky toffee pudding.  They even got an iron butterfly right!  The breakfast was quite good too.  I learned that eggs over haggis is fabulous!

·         The bed was not good on the comfort level.  At least is was huge.

·         The bathroom soaps were not provided.  They were mismatched products other people left behind.  That was amazing.

no shit.

Boo says it’s likely all their money goes to a litany of repairs.  Ya know, not my problem